TITLE
Mr. McRapeypants, part 4
Wed, Nov 19 2008
[9.00 PM]
MARIE
*sighs* I guess this
means I have to let Drepanon back.
DESMODA
Yes, well, it is how
your production partner copes with not having the real thing in real life.
OVD
DESMODA.
DESMODA
OVD.
[exit
DÉSMODA]
[enter
DESMODA leading DREPANON on a leash.]
EPIPHANY
zaps DESMODA
DESMODA
That's fair.
DREPANON
I'm just glad it wasn't
a metal leash and collar.
EPIPHANY
[Well,
not every day can be my day.]
DREPANON
takes off the collar and leash.
ILLYBRIUS takes a step back
ILLYBRIUS
If I go,
Usagi goes too. Otherwise he'll be devastated.
REIYA
I'd be
devastated too if I had to spend more time than other core cast members on the
set with this--
OVD
REIYA DO
YOU WANT THE SET FLOODED AGAIN
REIYA
rEiYa Do YoU
wAnT tHe SeT fLoOdEd AgAiN?
AKUMA
As if I
would leave him behind.
MARIE
So Akuma is
so much more willing to stay with Usagi than her own husband.
TOD
Therefore,
she has no room to complain that Illybrius prefers someone else's company to
her own. DOES SHE, NOW.
EPIPHANY
[There's no drama in separating Akuma and Usagi, so Akuma won't
do it.]
TOD
My
apologies. It seems I'm taking some of this dialog entirely too personally.
AKUMA, ^_~
Or maybe
Enon could babysit him.
USAGI throws himself between Akuma and Illybrius
USAGI
NOT
HAPPENING!
TOD
You were
saying?
EPIPHANY
[I sit corrected.]
USAGI straightens up and clears his throat.
USAGI
I am sorry
but he's been a little TOO interested in me lately, ever since that foursome
with Caleb and Gany.
EPIPHANY
[Bunny-boy to the
rescue!]
AKUMA
You poor
thing.
DREPANON
You know,
sexual harassment is actually a serious issue and--
LENA
*AIRHORN
NOISE*
...
Did I do
that right?
SERLEINA
Eh, close enough.
MARIE
I would like
to say that the writer Falcon is being extremely petty right now, and I hope it
doesn't get her in trouble later.
CIN
She says,
"Hashtag Yolo", whatever the hell that's supposed to mean.
MARIE
Then I
suppose I have done my part in attempting to protect her from her own bad
decisions.
SERLEINA
TEXT MESSAGE! The Kettle says he's out of minutes, but
"Aunt Lena, what the actual fuck even was that"?
LENA
I thought
we'd been over this! That was my attempt at an airhorn noise!
SERLEINA
TEXT MESSAGE! He
says it sounded like you were trying to bull-rush Drepanon but you weren't
actually moving.
LENA
Well, that's
low-budget animation for you.
MARIE
More like,
no-budget animation.
XALDIN
[We COULD always put Epiphany's extorted money towards
proper animation, but we don't have the heart between us.]
USAGI
I ain't
staying in a room with him in it. Not even for a second.
LENA
So do we
actually bull-rush someone now or?
EVRYN
He's talking
about Enon.
LENA
Ohhhh. Yeah,
don't bull-rush Enon. The poor guy almost got murdered last installment because
of ableism!
DREPANON
Hey, how
come you--
LENA
BECAUSE THE
PRODUCTION TEAM PREFERS TUMBLR OVER FACEBOOK!
MARIE
Also,
Britney's whole thing about that made me very uncomfortable.
LENA
Yes, it was
rather annoying.
AKUMA
Don't worry,
Lee. You can come too.
ILLYBRIUS
Well then
mind you, keep a firm hand on the soap bar, Usagi. You'll be sharing the shower
tomorrow. Larlia's expecting someone over.
AKUMA
Oh boy.
ILLYBRIUS
But not too
firm. I've learned from experience that that doesn't always work.
EPIPHANY
[Did. . . did we just
make a "don't drop the soap" joke?]
EVRYN
Yes, yes we did.
LENA
Can we maybe
not?
ILLYBRIUS
What? I'm
eternally childish.
CIN
From his
writer, "At least HE gets away with it."
AKUMA: ^_^
USAGI:
>_<
AKUMA
I'll come
back tomorrow, Lee. I need to get someplace safe. There is a storm moving in.
SERLEINA
IS IT CAUSED BY A ...................... GLOWERING SKYE?! HA! GET IT?
MARIE
I thought
you were gonna say, "Smooth Criminal."
SERLEINA
THAT WAS MY SECOND GUESS!
ILLYBRIUS and AKUMA kiss.
SERLEINA
... Oh. That-- No, I didn't-- ugh.
ILLYBRIUS
Night.
AKUMA
Goodnight,
Kibito.
EVRYN poses.
Tree?
AKUMA
Sweet
dreams.
USAGI
HE'LL HAVE
SWEETER DREAMS THAN I WILL!
REIYA
I shall
dream of the weeaboo burning.
USAGI
SHE'LL HAVE
BETTER DREAMS THAN ME, TOO!
SERLEINA
🎵DEAD SKYE ARE YOU
OKAY
ARE YOU OKAY
ARE YOU OKAY DEAD SKYE
YOU'VE BEEN HIT BY
YOU'VE BEEN SHOT BY
A SMOOTH CRIMINAL🎵
SIGYN
Okay so
since my contract says I have to be petty at people other than Drepanon from
time to time... Hey Dante, why did the chicken cross the road?
DANTE
... I've
heard th—
SIGYN
YOUR
HUSBAND'S DEAD! HA!
SERLEINA
Dude, that
was excellent!
DANTE
That's not
even how it—
SERLEINA
SHOWQUIT!
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